I Guess That Was March Then

I have not been inclined to blog much lately, even though I do miss it, and its a great record for our family. I guess its hard to blog for 3 years about your lovely little family, Mama, Papa and baby, only to have Papa walk out after being exposed as the worst possible kind of husband. I am still coming to terms with being a single Mama. Anyway, a couple of die hard readers have been in touch asking about the blog so it pushed me in to a new post.
March has been very busy for me and a bit traumatic. My Mum broke her arm, my friend lost her son, Oscar and Aimee had the Norovirus and I started about 100 projects and then left them half finished. Ah well, lets hope April has better things in store.

my poor poor baby

He spent a lot of time in bed.

I on the other hand spent some time lounging on top of the bed when I bought myself a onesie and discovered how hot they are.

heatwave !

We have had some beautiful sunsets from our street here by the sea.

And of course, a pretty amazing solar eclipse.

Thankfully Oscar is just about 100% better now, right in the nick of time for the Easter school break, 3.5 days and he's counting.

Easter is a very precious time to me, and as with many Christians, we turn our thoughts to our Savior Jesus Christ.

Yesterday was palm Sunday and I couldn't help but think of Him riding in on donkey to cheers of joy, knowing full well that in a few short days he would suffer in ways we can't even comprehend.

How fortunate we are sometimes not to know what suffering we will have to endure on our path in this life. Our Lord had no such luxury.

Being A Christian Lone Parent

I read this article the other day, and I have to be honest and say a lot of it resonated with me. I am not the only single parent in our ward, there are 5 of us (active and attending most weeks), so in some respects its been made slightly easier for me. I do however, understand exactly how the author feels about the church's strong push to towards the nuclear family being the only way to survive in this modern world. I actually, kind of agree with this, but I also hope it doesn't mean I am doomed to failure because I cant meet the standard.

My impending divorce also falls within the 'acceptable category' of Christian LDS divorce, namely, it was my husbands fault. I offered reconciliation, joint counseling, and the promise to try and exercise forgiveness. The truth is, my ex didnt want forgiveness, he made it very clear he wanted to carry on being unfaithful and promptly moved out of our home and began living in another city.

I like to think I am a good Mother, we all have our insecurities, but on the whole, I try pretty hard, and no one could claim to love their children more than me. How sad then, to feel that no matter how hard I try, it just won't be enough, because his Daddy left.

I do want to find an eternal husband though, and although I have made small baby steps towards getting to know other single people, I am also aware that the amount of single LDS women far out weighs the amount of single LDS men (unless I move to Utah or Idaho, which may not be as far fetched as it first sounds).  I may not find someone in this mortal life and it grieves me to think I will feel like a failure all that time.

For now, I am navigating the ups and downs of managing alone (my son is sick today and not in school, so I couldnt go to work). I am sad my marriage ended (devastated may be a better description), but the support I have received from my church and church friends has far exceeded the feeling of not being 'part of the club'.

V

What A Year

I started the year in January full of optimism.

I had a feeling changes were on the horizon, but I wrongly assumed my big life event

of 2014 would be Oscar starting school. 

In February Oscar had his 5th birthday ! 

I could hardly believe he had been dancing around the sun for 5 years.

March was a quiet month.

I spent a lot of time cooking and knitting and thinking about my faith.

In April we sadly marked the passing of another year since we lost our baby, Ellie-Rose.

April is always a sad month now.

May was very busy. We went to Edinburgh to say goodbye to one of our missionaries. 

I went to our Temple in Preston and had some special experiences, and we also had Duncan's birthday 

and Aimee's birthday.

natural history museum - Edinburgh

In June Oscar had his school induction days and did really well. 

We also had some actual sunshine

In July the school holidays began 

and Oscar did his first ever stage performance with his theatre group.

In August, my baby started school !

September !

We went on holiday.

I found out my husband was not the man I thought he was,

our marriage ended.

In October we had to re-home the pets, and ourselves.

The children and I moved to a little apartment of our own.

In November we just really did some settling in. I focused a lot on my Faith, and 

began to establish new routines.

December, and I coped with my first post break up birthday and wedding anniversary.

Oscar did his 2nd stage show.

My friend and I started our little business venture, 

and we celebrated Christmas where I had my mind firmly fixed on our Savior Jesus Christ.

Who knows what 2015 will bring. 

My Faith has grown and grown this year, and because of that

I can trust my future is safe in the Lords hands

Happy New Year when it comes !

See you on the other side.

Valerie

xxx

Oh Sunday, How Much I Love You

Going to Church every Sunday makes me happy,

but its so much more than that. It really is a day to stop and see what

the Lord has given us, and to enjoy it.

Some days are harder than others to accomplish this, but I think that as long as

we know that the small wonders of every day life are always there, and it is only our ability to 

appreciate them that alters then some comfort can always be had.

The view from my window in the morning

Faded flowers in the church foyer

Or lesson for today - Lord Is It I?

A View Of The River From Church

A Cheeky Little Cat On The Garden Wall

Candles And Our Savior

A Selfie In My Dressing Gown

My Bedside At Night

I hope you all had a beautiful and peace filled Sunday.

Christmas Dinner With The Family

This will be the last year we are all together.

Many people have been questioning 'how' I can have my ex-husband

here for Christmas. 

The answer is very simple. My precious son.

Oscar is only 5 years old, and as far as he knows, his Daddy works away

all week and returns at the weekend.

I know this can't go on much longer, but Christmas was not

the time to tell him.

Being Christ-like is very important to me, and when ever I am struggling,

I ask myself

'what would our Savior do?'

It gives me a quiet strength I never knew was possible.

Anyway, here is Christmas dinner in pictures.

Look how Christ is at the head of our table. 

This made me so happy.

Oscar & Aimee

Oscar, Aimee & Christopher

Duncan, Oscar & Aimee

Christopher & Me

Christopher & Me

Oscar

Oscar

Aimee

Duncan

Christopher

lunch

Time with the Savior when the house fell quiet.

Merry Christmas

May you feel the Spirit of The Lord with you.

xxx

Christmas Eve And Christmas Morning

Sorry for a photo heavy post, but they were mostly too cute to leave any out.

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and that you remembered Christ in amongst the celebrations of His birth.